I was recently advising a client who felt overwhelmed by her circumstances, and unable to focus on coming up with a plan to tackle the obstacles ahead of her. Instead of examining the chaos around her, she was allowing herself to get swallowed up by it, leading to self-doubt.
It’s natural to have doubts in our abilities at times. It’s important to realize the inner strength you have, especially when people are doubting you, or when you’re doubting yourself. This is something we all feel at times, so I wanted to share what I do when this happens to me.
When something bad happens and you get upset and you don’t know how to handle it, you actually have the power to overcome that. Harvard Business Review ran an article with tips on how to counter self-doubt. One phrase that stood out was “Constructive feedback can be incredibly valuable — but when feedback is not constructive, it’s essential to learn to ignore it.”
Sometimes we internalize criticism, whether it’s informed or not. That’s when it’s vital to be able to clear your mind. During times of crisis, I make it a point to step away, get quiet, give myself time to process and figure out the best thing to do. When I think I can’t do something, I remind myself of all the things I’ve done in my life. And I tell myself that this is just one more challenge. It maybe a little harder, it may be a little difficult, but I’ve done all of those other things, I can damn well do this. I remember who I am, what I’ve done and I can summon the power to know I can handle the current challenge.
For all of us, once our minds are clear, we can figure out the best way to accomplish what we need to do. First we have to get our minds straight about any insecurities we’re having, or resolve any lack of confidence. Once we get rid of that, we’re free to be the bad-ass we know we are.
And remember, don’t lose faith in yourself because you think you need to be perfect. For example, there are things I know I’m not good at, but I don’t let it shake my confidence. Life isn’t about shooting for perfection, it’s about being the best you can be.
